Dear Unconditional Love
No matter what happens, I seem to figure things out on my own. I grow older and wiser with each passing moment. I have so many amazing things that I have yet to experience in life. So many ups and downs, challenges and triumphs. Each day always creating an even better and more refined version of myself, even when there are days that feel like I am going in reverse. Eventually it is merely making me stronger and more appreciative of the future and the now. I keep moving forward somehow, always moving no matter how slowly, when there are days when getting out of bed is all that can be mentally accomplished. I continue to do what I can to give my all to each day, even when my all is more on some days than others. I try to be brave and to feel no fear, to be sure to conquer the fear that makes it through. The last couple years have pushed me more than I ever knew possible. Given me so many days that I had nothing left to offer but laughter at the irony of life, the ridiculousness of the situation, and the realization that no matter how bad things seem they can always be worse. I do not sit here vindicated I sit here thankful and rejuvenated with the things that I have been allowed to overcome and to grow from. Everything is a blessing, a new opportunity to learn from in the classroom of life. I have been incredibly fortunate with those in my life whose love has been my rock, my strength when I no longer had anything to give. No matter what capacity it came in I will NEVER forget, and I only hope to come close for anyone in life to try to repay back this miracle of love to the universe.
Yet it has all been bittersweet because you have not been here to share it with me. You have not been here to grow with me, to laugh with me, to cry with me, and to merely LIVE life with me. To me this is the most unacceptable thing of all. I know you are somewhere, so close and yet so far away, but what are you waiting for? I have never been very good with patience and I cannot find a valid way to justify each day gone without you in my life. In searching I am afraid that we may have gotten lost along the way, that we somehow missed what was there. So I will sit here becoming the best I can be for you and more importantly for me each and every day. I will not close my eyes to whatever way it is that you have chosen to reveal yourself to me this time. I don't want to live with regrets and each day wasted without you is a waste of time that could have been OURS. Time that can go by in the blink of an eye if we are not careful. I'm no longer afraid, so why should you be? Stop making excuses, stop postponing life. Stop being afraid of the end before a beginning is ever allowed to happen. There is no reason to postpone the ultimate in shared happiness. I am here telling you that I am not running, I'm here and I am ready. So what are you waiting for? Come and get me.
Your Soulmate
*This is a letter I wrote in February of 2010 as I was feeling very open to welcome new and wonderful experiences into my life.
No matter what happens, I seem to figure things out on my own. I grow older and wiser with each passing moment. I have so many amazing things that I have yet to experience in life. So many ups and downs, challenges and triumphs. Each day always creating an even better and more refined version of myself, even when there are days that feel like I am going in reverse. Eventually it is merely making me stronger and more appreciative of the future and the now. I keep moving forward somehow, always moving no matter how slowly, when there are days when getting out of bed is all that can be mentally accomplished. I continue to do what I can to give my all to each day, even when my all is more on some days than others. I try to be brave and to feel no fear, to be sure to conquer the fear that makes it through. The last couple years have pushed me more than I ever knew possible. Given me so many days that I had nothing left to offer but laughter at the irony of life, the ridiculousness of the situation, and the realization that no matter how bad things seem they can always be worse. I do not sit here vindicated I sit here thankful and rejuvenated with the things that I have been allowed to overcome and to grow from. Everything is a blessing, a new opportunity to learn from in the classroom of life. I have been incredibly fortunate with those in my life whose love has been my rock, my strength when I no longer had anything to give. No matter what capacity it came in I will NEVER forget, and I only hope to come close for anyone in life to try to repay back this miracle of love to the universe.
Yet it has all been bittersweet because you have not been here to share it with me. You have not been here to grow with me, to laugh with me, to cry with me, and to merely LIVE life with me. To me this is the most unacceptable thing of all. I know you are somewhere, so close and yet so far away, but what are you waiting for? I have never been very good with patience and I cannot find a valid way to justify each day gone without you in my life. In searching I am afraid that we may have gotten lost along the way, that we somehow missed what was there. So I will sit here becoming the best I can be for you and more importantly for me each and every day. I will not close my eyes to whatever way it is that you have chosen to reveal yourself to me this time. I don't want to live with regrets and each day wasted without you is a waste of time that could have been OURS. Time that can go by in the blink of an eye if we are not careful. I'm no longer afraid, so why should you be? Stop making excuses, stop postponing life. Stop being afraid of the end before a beginning is ever allowed to happen. There is no reason to postpone the ultimate in shared happiness. I am here telling you that I am not running, I'm here and I am ready. So what are you waiting for? Come and get me.
Your Soulmate
*This is a letter I wrote in February of 2010 as I was feeling very open to welcome new and wonderful experiences into my life.
Very powerful, I know there are plenty still pondering the same about their "hopeful" soulmate. Didn't realize you were a secret member of the die hard romantic club.
ReplyDeleteYou should know that about me by now. I'm just unlucky in love.
ReplyDeleteWhen you have a wonderful heart, mind, spirit, no such idea as unlucky, those who don't appreciate, nurture and cherish all that is you are the unlucky souls.
ReplyDeletePowerful words, thank you. Does that include you?
ReplyDeleteYes ma'am but honestly were you in love with me?
ReplyDelete