Thoughts on Technology & Humanity

When we moved from the sword to the gun, did we lose some of our humanity? Is gun use less personal? And are those using guns less skilled and ethical then earlier warriors who used the sword or bow?

In order to answer this question, one must define humanity.  Humanity can be defined as: the quality or state of being humane; the quality or state of being human; the branches of learning that investigate human constructs and concerns; the human race; whereas humane is defined as: kind or gentle to people or animals (Miriam-Webster 2014).  In that sense I would say that no, we did not lose some of our humanity; in some sense you could even go so far as to say that guns became more humane.  Many sword injuries do not result in an instant death or even a quick one, unless through beheading, which usually was not accomplished in one fell swoop.  Killing is still killing regardless of what weapon is being wielded. 

I honestly think that that a weapon being more or less personal has more to do with each individual and their values and beliefs, as well as their cultural and societal values and beliefs.  As a society death has become less personal and valuable.  We may have more humane ways of killing death row inmates with lethal injections, but that involves someone in another room pushing the buttons to activate the series of injections for a quick and low pain type of death.  If we are to take a look at earlier methods such as a firing squad, one could argue the humanity, but one could not argue the fact that it was much more personal to line up and look someone in the eyes and shoot them; whether or not the shooter knew which bullet was the one to deal the killing blow.  I do not see how this is less personable than a sniper.  Never having been a sniper myself, I can attest to those around me in the personal way in which they have felt and relived each and every death that has come as a result of their weapon being fired.  They watch many of these shots and aftermaths for kill assessment through a scope, but they image and those memories never leave them.  The same can be said for Drones, just because they may be classified as a “game” environment, does not mean that if it less personal.  Many people are now being classified as having PTSD from the images on those screens, in a drone situation you are there to watch and get a BDA (battle damage assessment), you can be made to watch helplessly if any bombs go astray or if your own people are being shot and killed by the enemy.  Again, skills and ethics have to do with the individual wielding a weapon, not the actual weapon itself. 

References

Miriam-Webster. (2014). http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/humanity

Thankful

I have spent a lot of time this year, and especially today thinking about all of the things in my life that I am thankful for.  I wanted to share some of those precious things with you and let you know all that I am in gratitude for that have made an big impact on my 2013.

First and foremost Liam, my son, my #1 man, my rock, my heart, my world.  I never knew what love was until he came into my life.  I never knew for sure what my purpose was until I became his mother.  To love something completely before you even get to see it is amazing.  Watching him grow up into such a character with so much personality, and energy  but also compassion for others.  I am so proud to be Liam's mommy, and very blessed to have him brought into my life.

Then we come to my mother.  I am so happy that you were a young mother, that you were such an unselfish mother the whole time I was growing up even to your own detriment at times.  That you taught me kindness and love and showed me how to be a good mother.  That you have been able to be the type of mother that I consider to be my best friend, that we have been blessed to be such a big part of one anothers' lives.  I regret that we do not live closer, because I hate not being able to see you all of the time.  I am so happy that I get to see you next week, because we are too close to not see one another, and I want Liam to know his grandmother.

I am so very thankful for my daddy.  You can be a hard man to live with, but I would not choose any single other person in this world to call my father.  You have been in my life from the beginning.  You are an amazing and honorable man to love me as your own and to continue to love me regardless of divorce from mom.  You have always been my hero in life, from fireman, to green beret to grandfather.  You have made the 20+ hour trek to Texas at least once a year to spend time with us and it does not go unnoticed.  I have always had you to look up to, and many of my major decisions in life I have made based off of your intelligence and your example.  I remember you being worried that I wouldn't love you anymore when you and mom got divorced and I could not fathom how you could even ask me that question.  You are the only father my heart ever has and ever will love.  I always loved you and appreciated all that you have done for me, but it wasn't until becoming a single mother and dating and seeing the way men would interact with Liam or tell me their stance on "someone else's child" that I truly found appreciation in the selfless love that you and all of that side of the family has always shown me.  I have NEVER felt like I didn't belong with you all and I am so thankful for the closeness and love that I have known because I have had you in my life.  I will not EVER get married unless I can find someone who can love Liam and I the way that  you loved us.  

Of course my dear sister.  The only person that can drive my emotions onto a roller-coaster in mere seconds.  The friend I always wanted to be closer to, the sister I always worried about.  The person who has pushed every single limit and boundary I have and then tested them again.  I am thankful that we find a way to live close to one another even if we are far from home.  I am thankful for you being there for me and helping me with Liam when I was all alone.  I honestly don't know how I would have survived those first few months without you.  You have taught me so many lessons about life and I only ever hope to see you happy.  I know I am overprotective at times and worry too much and get constantly told to quit acting like your mother, but you are my dear sister and I would not be who I am in life without you to push me past my comfort zone.  You are my polar opposite in life, and I would not chose you to be another way.  I am thankful that no matter how mad you can make me, that I still love you.  Sometimes I wish that I could live life as freely as you do, but ultimately I am thankful for the moments when we can laugh and protect one another and I miss spending time together, the fleeting moments in recent times makes me miss my sister even when we live in the same city.  

My dog Kiri, I named you aptly for in many a dark time, you have been the sunlight that has shown through.  Before Liam, you helped me through very dark times in life.  You gave me purpose and reason.  Your ability to accommodate and become the 2nd best in life, is amazing.  I am thankful for your loyalty and your intelligence and that you are more bear than dog.  You make me smile and give me love all the time, unconditionally, and I am happy to be able to come home and always be loved no matter what has happened in life.  

My grandma Shirley, YOU ARE MY SALVATION.  Truly I cannot say anything deeper than that.  You have rescued me when I was drowning.  When I was at my lowest low, you were my anchor to help me come back to the surface.  You are the most selfless person I have and probably ever will meet in this life.  I live my life always hoping to repay you for all that you have done for me.  You are my example of what a true saint in life really is.  There truly are no words that can express the gratitude I feel in my heart, and I am so blessed to have you in my life, I love you so much.

My mentor, Bunny.  You have always shown me what a true example of self power can be.  The calm that is felt just in entering your house.  The way that a short talk with you can seem to solve so many unresolved issues is amazing.  You are so talented and gifted and caring.  I have learned so many amazing things from you, and I am sad that I do not get to feel the peace that I find in your presence more often.  I miss your energy in person and wish that I was closer to do more things like bring you flowers and drink tea and soak in the sunlight and bask in your wisdom.  You are such an amazing being.  

My cousins Savannah & Marie, I am so thankful that we are so close in age and got to grow up knowing one another.  I have recently been very sad that Liam does not have that, and does not know people in the family and be close like we were.  We have experienced things in life that no one ever will.  I don't think I have ever laughed as hard as I have in the presence of you both.  You have both taught me what being the short non-artistic cousin is like and how I can excel in other ways ;)  I will never know another driver quite like Marie, and never will I know another laugh as full of happiness as yours either.  With Savannah I will never be able to share a quirky humor that could be understand outside of us, or the love of dogs, and I am so thankful that we live within driving distance.  You have helped me escape and have been a wonderful :auntie: to Liam :)

I am so thankful for each and every family member in one way or another, I could write an entire book.  But I will be here all night.... to be continued...

My job, I am so thankful to have been lucky enough to stay within the same line of work for over 11 years now.  I have somehow escaped my degree thus far, but I do hope to return to school in 2014.  Even when I have a hard time going, it gives me the security that helps me to be the best mother that I can to Liam.  I am also very thankful for an amazing boss who has stood by me and fought for me when he didn't have to.  Who has helped me more than he will ever know and is a truly good person.  I am thankful for the timing of this job when I needed quickly out of a desperate situation and that I had a quick and easy transition to the other side of my office :)

I am thankful for the military for giving me skills and experiences that I would not have otherwise ever encountered in any other way.  And for life-changing people who have taught me many lessons in life good and bad.  I would not be me without those people.

I am thankful for my friends far and wide and never fully realized just HOW amazing and special my friends in life have been and how blessed I was until I moved here.  I wish I lived closer to at least one of you, because life is lonely without my amazing bonds.

I am thankful for the internet and social media to allow me to easily continue friendships from afar and to make new ones.

I am thankful for a car that gets me to work and where I need to go, and for the ability to have a roof over my head.  

I am thankful for music, that my music tastes are so wide and that I can listen to a vast amount of different things and not be so limited by a narrow mind.

I am thankful for books, that help me escape and teach me so many things, and give me things to look forward to.  

My sense of humor and the ability to find humor in SO many different things, and those few friend that I can share the worst of jokes with and know that you will laugh with me.

Netflix, which has been a savior in many ways.  

Movies: My love and obsession.

But most of all, I am thankful for the little things in life, I could be here all night.  But let me close with saying that I am thankful for opportunities that can somehow appear to be horrible disasters that are life changing and eye opening and really ways of saving yourself in a way that you would have never encountered before.  But really I am just THANKFUL to be alive and to have this opportunity at life.

Government Shutdown Contemplations

My post title may be a bit misleading as I am not really here to talk about anything overly political.  Rather I am here to share my thoughts on the ripple effect that politics and consequently the government shutdown has had around me and how easily this situation could really escalate into something much worse. 
I was very thankful to no longer be a government employee when all of this started happening and I know so many people that were to be and still are affected by the shut down.  I found myself incredibly thankful to be a NAF (non-appropriated funds) worker.
The day of the shutdown is when it seemed to have the most impact on me mentally.  I was scrolling down my facebook newsfeed and just reading through the fears and prayers and anger and frustration and a whole range of emotions felt by my friends each directly and indirectly affected by this issue in some way or another after the furlough letters went out. 
Of course it was being covered by the news networks but I remember thinking how petty the news was when so many people were about to go without pay for an undetermined amount of time and all the news seemed to care about was the fact the museums and national parks were going to be closed and how this could affect the weddings that were planned to take place at them (mainly national parks).  Although I am sure that if it were my wedding that I would have felt a little more slighted, but being that it was not I felt that this was such a travesty to parade around a couple who seemed more excited about being on tv than upset about the need to change their venue for their wedding.  Why were they not interviewing the national park workers, or museum workers, or countless other government employees that had no idea how long it would be before they brought home a paycheck to take care of their families. 
I started to have intense flashbacks to when I had been previously unemployed and the emotions that I felt at the time.  I remembered how scary it was and how powerless you felt when you would do everything in your power and it still didn't seem to be enough, how quickly bills would stack up and you would find yourself doing things like donating plasma just to pay for gas and food.  now I know that for the majority of the furloughed workers that things have not escalated to the point that they did with me, but how far off are they?  With the American economy in a slump for so many years it has left the majority of people in a water treading type of financial situation.  Some have excelled and others are constantly aflounder relying on paycheck to paycheck to stay afloat.  After many of these currently furloughed workers previously losing 20% of their pay for about 5 weeks in a row less than a month ago, I can only imagine the toll that this is taking on their mental state. 
It was sometime amidst this thought process that I heard that the commissary (the on base military grocery store) would be closing after that night for the duration of the furlough.  Already in need of a couple staple items I figured it would be best to try to head over and get what I could while it was open.  Although our commissary at the base here is not a very big one it was a mad dash for each item.  Lots of shelves were bare and there was mass chaos ensuing at every aisle as the stress and frustration had found it's way into the grocery store.  I grabbed one of the last packets of hamburger meat and proceeded on to other items that I required and kept looking around and many bare spots within the shelves.  All that I could think about was that it was reminiscent of a natural disaster and what if things escalated and we could not go out to off-base grocery stores, what if they looked the same and I would be utterly unprepared.  Would we still have electricity?  would I be able to make use of my freezer and fridge items?  How long would I really have before all of that food expired on me and I was left to rely on what was in my pantry?
Having grown up in Montana the concept of food storage was not a foreign thing to me.  There would be many times when the threat of being snowed in for a few days or more was a very real thing.  You never knew how long you would need to be prepared for and so we always had a stockpile of dried and canned goods.  Since moving to Texas I have had to start over from scratch and have moved every year in the last four years.  Also I have lived alone the majority of the time, with small stints of my sister coming and going.  Because of this, I have never fully gotten a very lengthy supply of any pantry items.  I honestly don't think that I could survive for more than a couple of weeks (and that's stretching it) if I had to.  I really feel like I need to be better prepared for anything. 
Times like this bring out the fear and consequently the frustration and anger in people.  These can be dangerous times.  I keep thinking that now would be the time that an active shooter scenario that we have seen at Fort Hood and the recent navy yard could easily be just about anyone that has been put into this trying situation. 
I pray for the safety and peace of mind for all of the brothers and sisters in arms and in our nation during this time of strife.  I also pray for the politicians to soften their hearts and their minds to come to the most benevolent decision for our country.  I pray that they can put our country first and personal agendas first.  Service before self is not happening here.  If we are not careful we will turn ourselves into a third world country.  We have to stand together as a nation, because without the strength of unity we are weak when divided and when divided we shall fall.  I wish that I could replace the anger and the fear and hatred in the hearts of our leaders and our citizens with love for something.  Whether it be this great nation we live in and die for or for the reason we all came here in the first place and the reasons we choose to remain when we have a vast amount of other countries to chose from, we remain here in what we call home.  Right now we need to take care of our home, tend our own lawns, come together as a people.  We need to spread the feeling of love, whether it be in a simple gesture of something more grandeur.  We need to worry about ourselves and fix what is wrong at home in our country.  Politics has become a bad marriage and we are the children that can be damaged for life if their is no reconciliation and this marriage is torn apart.  Where is the marriage counseling here?  Where is the love that all sides had in their hearts to make this nation great, keep it great and the pride to continue to grow in greatness?  We seem to have lost some of ourselves as a nation in the greed for whatever vices we hold.  We need to find the love, the pride, the unity that makes us what we are as Americans...

I could go on for quite some time, but I think that my point has been made, and I have gotten across the message that I wanted to send.  I send love and light to all of my fellow Americans no matter how weak or strong and I hope that we can all stand together and hold the hands of those next to us to help our Nation rise up to the greatness she can be.  We are all powerful as one.