Battle of the Grandmas

Battle of the Grandmas is written by Anthonette Klinkerman and is in appearance a children’s book. Klinkerman writes from a school teacher and mother’s perspective.

Klinkerman’s Grandmas are easily relatable for many adult readers of the story. It revolves around 3 grandparents and a young girl named Madelyn. In order to win her affections each of them tried to earn the title of “best grandma” by giving the greatest and most extravagant gifts to their granddaughter.

Through the telling of this story one can assume that the little girl must be the only grandchild based on the gifts that she receives. This story holds a definite moral for all of us. Physical presence and attention is more important that any gift that we can give to our child.

The younger the child, the happier they are with anything to share with you, whether it is a box, a craft you have made, a store bought toy, etc. Many times in a younger child’s life they will be just as happy, if not more so with the box the toy came in.

This story shows that all that the girls wanted was to be able to spend time with her grandmas, not the plethora of gifts she was receiving. She reached the point of gift reception that she began to dread getting a package in the mail. Their love seemed to be more for a façade than actual love to her because instead of being there with her, they were sending store bought “love”. Upon accidentally all sending their granddaughter the same book, this started an all-out gift giving trench warfare. The grandmothers started worrying more about competing with one another to send the best gift rather than what it was that their granddaughter really wanted/needed from them.

Battle of the Grandmas consists of 34 pages of full-length color cartoon-like illustrations. The story is told in a rhyming format. The lettering is easy to read and perfect for children with a slightly longer attention span in the age range of about 3-8 years old.

Overall I give this book 4/5 stars. I love that the moral is one of quantity over quality of relationships. It was a quick read, but it did seem more directed at an adult, and my 4 year old rated it low on re-readability. It is a great book to read if you are into teaching lasting values with your children, children’s book, illustrated books, sharing, grandmothers, gift-giving, etc.

*I received a free copy of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.

HSC (Highly Sensitive Child) or ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder)?

I am doing research right now and I found a section in a book that reminded me so much of Liam's issues with his last day and hit the nail right on the head, so I wanted to share it, because it was always my argument against any claims that he as a 2-3 year old had ADD: many teachers or counselors are most familiar with the attention deficit disorder...an HSC (highly sensitive child) who naturally notices sounds and movement will be highly distractible in distracting environments which could lead to the diagnosis of ADD. However, such a child will have good concentration when there are no distractions, which is not typical of children with ADD/ADHD. If the disorder began due to a change with a new teacher or school, often a poor fit is the real cause. A teacher who demands that children be highly focused at all times, may result in an HSC that unable to focus, making them more aroused or anxious which will further decrease their ability to focus.

Thank you, moving my son to a more suitable environment made ALL the difference in the world, even if I did it without reading this book first. Liam was labeled as a trouble child with no discipline because he had issues sitting in a chair with little to no activity for the majority of his day, at the age of 2-3 years old. 

He is now a leader, and a good example, and was always at the top of his class in what he actually knew in terms of his education, so now he is excelling even more. 

I was even advised by his daycare to talk to his pediatrician about medication for ADD. He is a CHILD, he is MEANT TO BE A CHILD. Stop trying to force medicate because you don't want to allow children to thrive and grow if it causes you to exert any extra effort. If you can't handle it, then PLEASE, for the LOVE OF OUR FUTURE, STAY OUT OF THE ROLE of being any part of shaping child's life. 

Rant over. For further reading check out her book "The Highly Sensitive Child"

DIY: Activities for Toddler Part 4

As I sit here on a Friday night planning on fun things for Liam and I to do I always turn to my DIY lists and try to choose at least 1 activity a weekend.  Since we were able to accomplish a couple, it was time to find some new activities to add to the list.  I am still working on a few oldies but I found some spectacular new goodies :)  Enjoy!  Please feel free to add any suggestions you have so that we can try them out!

Bunny Collage

www.busybeekidscrafts.com

I love how simple and adorable this is!  Plus the supplies are easy to come by and uses stuff we already have around the house :)








Supplies:
Construction Paper
White Paint
Q-Tips
Shallow container/paper plate
Cotton Balls
Scissors
Glue
Black Marker

Directions:
Cut out a green strip of "grass" and glue it onto a piece of sky blue paper.
Pour some white paint into a shallow container or paper plate. Make your Bunnies out of two thumb prints. One for the head, and one for the body. Make as many bunnies as you'd like, anywhere in the meadow.
Break off the ends of your Q Tips and glue them on top of your thumb prints to make the bunny's ears. Glue on a small wad of cotton ball for the tail.
Cut out a sun from yellow construction paper and glue in on your scene. When the paint is dry, draw on the eyes, nose and whiskers.
Other options to add to your collage are green pieces of tissue paper stuck on as grass, or cotton ball clouds, be creative!

 Salt Painting

http://jugglingwithkids.com

This is a great and easy way to have a fun painting time at home with not too much of a mess.  I have seen a lot of people try this and similar things out in the past and have been wanting to try it with Liam since he is totally into creating different works of art. 
I keep wanting to do this one and find that I need to buy salt haha.






Supplies:
-Construction paper/cardstock
-Paintbrush and/or medicine dropper
-Colored water (we used about a tablespoon of water with 6-7 drops of food coloring)
-Salt
-Glue
-Little bowls for colored water


Directions:
Have your child draw a picture with glue.Then sprinkle the glue with salt.  We did this on top of a piece of cardboard, but a baking sheet will work well too. Next have your child take a paintbrush or a medicine dropper and drop colored water, one drop at a time onto the salt.
Some tips: Make sure they lightly touch the salt with the brush.  It also helps to have a bowl to clean the brush in between colors...otherwise you lose the colors start blending together and you lose the vibrant colors because they become murky. 

 Feed The Penguins Learning Game

 

littlefamilyfun.com

I can't lie, I am very excited about this activity.  Liam also has an obsession for the Swedish clay-mation show Pingu.  So he is totally into penguins.  Also we can throw learning in with counting and letters on the fish :)  What a spectacular idea. 













Supplies:
Cardboard Box (about Graham Cracker box sized)
Construction Paper (Black, White, Orange)
Goggle Eyes (2)
Scissors
Tape
Glue

Directions:
Wrap the black construction paper around the box. I only used 1 piece, so it didn't cover the top, bottom or the back of the box. But that's ok. :)
Cut an oval shaped hole for the mouth. It doesn't have to be perfect, just big enough for the fish to fit in.  (You'll want to leave paper off the top of the box so that you can get the fish out after they get put in.)
For the beak, cut a square out of orange construction paper. Then cut an oval shaped hole in the middle.  Tape the beak onto the penguin.
Glue 2 googly eyes on the penguin (or cut eyes out of paper and glue them on).
Cut out a white oval for the stomach and glue it on.
Cut out 2 orange feet and glue them onto the bottom of the box.
Cut out 2 black, oval flaps for the wings and tape one on each side.

For the FISH:

Just draw a fish shape onto a piece of paper and cut it out (Make sure it's small enough to fit in your penguin's mouth). Then use that fish as a template and draw some more fish on a piece of construction paper. Then place 2-3 MORE pieces of construction paper underneath and cut out the fish. (Saves time cutting out 3-4 at a time!)
Once you have all your fish, get a black marker and draw a dot for the eye and a little smile on each fish.
Then draw on whatever concept you want to teach: SHAPES, NUMBERS, LETTERS, MATH, WORDS, etc.
(Optional): For extra durability, laminate the fish so you can use them in other games later! (I actually just used clear contact paper).

Jello Ocean Bath

growingajeweledrose.com

 

 

 Messy activities in the bath are such a fantastic idea.  You get to be all messy and yet you don't have a huge mess to clean up!  Also if the mess is too much, just rinse it out and then wash your child up as they are already in the bathtub playing!  Liam loves the bathtub anyway, so I know he would love this activity!  I have found it to be quite the ordeal to find blue raspberry jello, so I am still in search mode.










Supplies:
4 Boxes Blue Raspberry Jello
Small bag of Smooth Round Stones (Such as used for candle accents)
Variety of sea life toys

Directions:
Let the jello set up.  Put it into the bottom of the tub and add some warm water to make the bath warm enough to play in.  Add the stones and toys and let them get in and have a ball.  This makes for a great sensory and learning experience!


If you would like to see the past DIY activities that we have completed together, check them out here:

Kool-Aid Dyed Pasta

Cardboard Owls

Alphabet Train

Make Your Own Rainstorm

Orange Sugar Scrub

Meditation Bottle

Boys Harmed by "Hookup Culture"

Earlier today I came across an article talking about the "hookup culture" and how is it also detrimental to the adolescence of  boys and not just girls.  I have always found it interesting the way the girls and women are more often portrayed as the only ones harmed in a situation, especially if it is sexual.  Men are always shown as the aggressor and women are almost always shown as the victim.  Of course in a bad situation, there can be a victim on both sides. 
As a mother of a  three-year-old boy, I have been trying to learn all that I can about what boys go through as they grow up to be able to understand and talk and most importantly listen with understanding to issues I admittedly don't know much about. I grew up in teenage girl hell, and never had any brothers. Although the majority of my friends were boys we didn't spend a large amount of time talking about feelings.
I have found that this is the trend also with men my age as I am single. It is not rare for me to get 3 or more messages in a week from people that I do not talk to on a regular basis saying something derogatory or asking for a nude photo out of the blue. I have at times received some extremely negative and downright rude responses when I do not oblige. 
I have also found that given my past experiences, I reached a point in my life where I found it hard to envision a man with really connecting on an emotional level. I know this was one of my issues in dating in the past.   I also know that some of this stemmed from my own childhood in the "tough love" approach taken by my own and many other fathers around me at our age.  If you aren't bleeding, you aren't hurt.  If you aren't puking you aren't sick.  If you were to see my father cry, the Earth must have shattered, etc. 
I have been so blessed to have the opportunity to try to learn even more from the eyes of my son. I have already (at a mere 3 years old) felt pain from the words and actions of one of his friends as directed towards him. I hope that I can do my best to teach him to be gentle with other people (any crush/dating prospects) but more importantly to be gentle with himself and to be confident that it IS manly to rise above situations and to have feelings. I hope this does not scar him during adolescence and I know it is a fine line to walk during some points in his life, but by being an understanding person, life will be much more satisfying and fulfilling and his connections with people will have so much more meaning and be long lasting in the long run. At least that is my hope anyway, I know that boys are very different from girls, and I am in a constant state of learning even in my "old age." I am just hoping to be able to do the best that I can to give him life long tools to feel the least amount of hardship with a single mother. 
I am very sad to see how much the "social" connection is disappearing with the younger generation. We are social creatures by nature and we need to have that face to face contact, and be hugged and loved in person, not over a computer screen....
The biggest negative comment I have about this article is as I stated before that in addressing the harm that the "hookup" culture is having on boys, it never really addresses the fact that some of them may be feeling guilt or regret or may also be feeling violated, and it NEVER painted any of the girls as the aggressor, when I know that they are out there in a lot more abundance than anyone is really talking about. 

If you are interested in reading the original article, it can be found here: Experts Say Boys Also Harmed By Hookup Culture

Over-Protectiveness: More Freedom Improves Child Development

You can never know what kind of parent you will be until parenthood is thrust upon you.  Whether or not you "plan" to have a baby there is NOTHING, I repeat nothing that can fully prepare you for what it will actually be like until you are there.  This is absolutely true no matter how many days you have been a parent...  Each day presents it's own unique set of fun, challenges, learning opportunities, mistakes, victories, and of course more love than the day before.  With that being said let's talk about this crazy thing that happens from the second you see that little one for the first time and is sealed forever from the first moment they are in your arms: over-protectiveness.

You suddenly feel the need to protect this precious life with every part of your mind, body, and soul.  it is something ingrained in us and it is a constant battle of balance as a parent.  You want to make sure that your child is safe, but you don't want to be SO over-protective that they don't learn anything either.  You want to wrap them up in a bubble suit before they go outside or lock them in the house (ok I didn't feel this way but many parents do).

Any moment that your child is spent in pain of any kind you feel crazed inside.  You would do ANYTHING to feel the pain for them, for them to never know sickness, or cuts or bruises.  And then you have to step back and realize that all of these things bring about knowledge and experience for them.  I know that sometimes a child will need to be burned to truly understand that something is hot.  You can tell them a million times but until they touch the oven or the burner or a flame, they will not be able to fully comprehend what "hot" really means without experiencing it for themselves.  Now hopefully at some point in their life they will have managed to acquire enough knowledge, experience and common sense to not need to experience EVERYTHING to learn from it.  Hopefully there will come a time when they can learn from observing those around them as well to avoid many negative paths that they could but don't have to travel.

Well let's get to the heart of the matter, at least as it pertains to the message I wanted to get out with this blog.  I recently came across an article about schools in New Zealand that have decided to take away all of the rules as they pertain to recess on the play ground.  They were having trouble with kids paying attention, sitting still, bullying one another etc.  From the outside looking in, one would think that all hell broke loose and that supervision had long since fled.  They would see tree climbing, skateboarding and *gasp* barefooted children playing outside in the dirt!  The horror (in case you don't know me in real life I mean this in the most sarcastic of ways)!  This school was actually letting kids go out and be kids outside in nature!  Of course there was still supervision to prevent any serious harm and to be there should anyone scrape a knee or need help in one way or another. 

However more amazing than actually letting kids get outside and be kids was the resulting aftermath.  After being allowed the freedom to play without strict rule following and constant berating for stepping out of line; these children were doing BETTER in school.  They were paying attention, exuding more confidence in their work, participating more.  Bullying dropped to a level of being nearly nonexistent.  More surprising the level of serious injuries also saw a decline! 

By being given the chance to learn around them and to learn what the boundaries where for themselves through experience they were able to more accurately learn the physical limitations of their own bodies.  They learned what "hot" really meant, what falling out of a tree, or off of  skateboard when going to fast was like.  And without anyone shoving the information down their throat or limiting their play to a level when any playground equipment became a "danger" they were able to set healthy limits on themselves!  These children were learning things that no amount of reading or hearing about could EVER teach them.  They were experiencing the world for themselves in a supervised but not overprotective controlling, rule-ridden environment. 

Of course my initial thought at reading this was how awesome this idea was, and how can I ensure that my son goes to a school of an obviously high intelligence in the way to "teach" and view children.  Then my second thought was: No wonder this is in New Zealand, if it was in America people would freak out and sue the school, etc.  Which made me wonder what the HECK is wrong with us.  Ok so I wonder this ALL the time.  But the whole legal system has become such a joke....  but that is going WAY off topic. 

The fact of the matter is that we live in a over-protective, over-medicated society and we have gotten lazy and selfish.  Instead of letting kids BE kids, so many people want to diagnose a healthily active child (especially boys) with having ADD.  "Sorry you son can't sit still for 4 hours at a time when he is 2, he must have ADD." What?  he is 2, he should be required to do something like that at his age, it's ludicrous and bad for him.  He needs to get around and learn using all of his senses.  He needs to be allowed to be 2.  Children are young for such a VERY short time.  Why take that away from them.  They need this foundation of learning through senses to have as many tools to make it in the world as an adult as we can provide them.  Yes we should teach them things, but in an age-appropriate way.  Counting, let's count the rocks in a line, or steps we have to walk up to go down the slide, or the petals on a flower, etc.  Colors, let's write the name of each color with the coordinating sidewalk chalk or get messy with paint (washable is always best) on some construction paper.  Let's let them learn as children CAN learn.  Let us as parents and teachers and anyone else who will ever have a moment to influence a child let them learn how to TRUST themselves, and their instincts.  Let's help them to learn their limitations and then how to strengthen themselves physically, mentally and spiritually to overcome any obstacles that they do encounter.  Let's give them role models worthy of attaining.  Let's teach them how the entire world is a learning experience, but also how to be safe from grave or serious harm.  Let's teach them how to work hard and reap the rewards with the freedom of play :)  Heck, do it for our own sanity, especially parents, teachers of the younger children, let them exercise and expend energy!  It will make an amazing difference in the behavior of a child!

Here is the awesome article that got me on this thought process.  I would love to hear your thoughts as well!  Feel free to comment below.

School Ditches Rules and Loses Bullies